Tuesday, April 01, 2008

So long, and thanks for all the fish

Along with Matthew and Jason and Scott, I'm heading out the door to a place where the sun shines, the air is fresh, and the streets are clogged with snow.

It's been fun. I've enjoyed exchanging ideas, shots and insults with all of you. But blogging can take you away from the real things in life, the things that matter, the things that count. Whatever they are.

I'm bored with the warfare, tired of the bickering, fed up with the sheer million-miles-thick stupidity of it all. I've never really liked confrontation and controversy, and I've always done my best to avoid that sort of thing. All I've ever wanted is a little peace and quiet.

I been Kathy Shaidled, Holy Bibled.
I been
Bobby Dylan'd, Kate McMillan'd.
I been Curried and Shlemazled till I'm blind.
I been Maher Arar'd, called a retard
Muslim, and a lefty blowhard.
That's the blogosphere, but never mind.

I been jeered and hectored, resurrected.
I been card sharper'd, Stephen Harper'd
Well, I paid all the dues I want to pay.
And I caught my sparks from Old Man Marx,
And all my
health won't get me wealth,
So I drink a quart of sake every day.

I knew a man, his brain so small,
He always blogs about nothin' at all.
He's not the same as you and me.
He's a Blogging Tory.
He's so unhip that
When you say Dawg, he thinks you're talkin' about Deppity Dawg,
Whoever he was.
The man ain't got no culture,
He's like Osama,
Unbelievers must get stoned.
I been Jason Kenney'd, Damian Penny'd.
Omar Khadr, won't you please come home?

I been
smothered, bothered, if'd and maybe'd,
Been
Jerry Falwell'd, Pastor Hagee'd.
I just discovered somebody's tapped my phone.

Bye, all. It's been a slice.

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